Tuesday, January 1, 2008

OK, I have to complain

Let me preface this by saying I am tired, really tired, the kind of tired where your bones ache. I feel like I have been taking care of sick kids, hosting company, doing holidays etc for years instead of the mere weeks it has been.

So here is the gripe. I am so sick of having a husband on an odd schedule. I hate that his days off are not the same as the girls days off and that we never get to do things as a family. I hate that his days off are not the same as other husbands, so I have to share his off days with other people. I hate that on weekends, I am virtually ignored. It sucks because I know how shitty it is to have three kids by yourself, the day is really long and exhausting, and I need contact with the outside world to remain sane. I know that I try to do that for others even when Ryan is home, and it sucks to be ignored when my kids are making me crazy even if it is a weekend for everyone else.

I really need Ry to get on a daytime schedule at the very least, Mon-Fri would be even better. Back to wrangling the kids, I will try not to cry, they are just being wild and normal kiddos, and I have to finish making dinner. Some days I feel incredibly isolated and alone.


theansweris said...

I am sorry I blew you off. I just had a lot of manual labor to tend to before I left and my parents came.


Tribe Mama said...

It isn't just today, I think we have established it happens a lot and it just hurts my feelings that I get blown off b/c someone better is around. I honestly don't think I do that, I spend a lot of Thursdays or Fridays with you alone or with you and the kids here. We don't go out and do things without calling you, even if I know you won't come, but it sucks being trapped with kids and I try to extend a hand.

I would have happily taken my kids to lunch alone. Instead I sat there, ignored, with no one to talk to. I understand it won't change, but I have a right to be upset about i.