Winding down

So Haven will be home from school tomorrow, this is becoming a bad trend on Mondays! She hasn't eaten all day and slept most of it, so she has earned a day off at home resting. Gray's cough is pretty bad, so he will probably be hanging here too.

I am finishing the last of today's cookies. They smell so yummy! The kids each did a holiday craft, I did some work and finished a paper. All I want right now is my warm and cozy bed!

I did, however, score a sweet deal for teacher gifts. I already got Haven's teacher some earrings and Brittan's teacher a ring. For Britt's aid, I ordered a half pound chocolate Christmas Mouse, and got a free set of 36 truffles and deluxe nuts, which will be perfect for Haven's two aids! All that for under 13 bucks shipped!!!

Christmas/Santa/Pagan Cookies

So as I was mixing up the dough for the next batch of Christmas cookies, a thought crossed my mind. I have come across many people who tell their children that there is no Santa and that Christmas is about Christ. Well, let's examine this for a moment.

Reviewing the story of Saint Nicholas you find that his acts of kindness took place in winter and he is believed to have been the origin of our Santa Claus. So far, this seems to line up, right time of year, sharing the wealth and showing love and kindness. On to Christ. Well Christmas is meant to celebrate the birth of Christ, but it is a well known and accepted fact that Christ was born in the Spring. The true reason that Christmas is celebrated in winter was to coincide with the pagan holidays including Winter Solstice and the Jewish holiday of Chanukah (seriously, ask your religious leaders, I know Em did and they were more than happy to agree that this was the reason).

So it seems to me, that telling children that Christmas in December is about the birth of Christ is simply untrue and that the "story" of Santa is actually more likely to be accurate. So, come on, let the kids have Santa! If it makes you feel better, we tell our kids that Christmas is supposed to be about the birth of Christ, but that it really happened in Spring. Maybe some of the ultra Christians could do that too, you know, be honest with the kids, and then tell them the story of Saint Nicholas as well.

The show must go on.....

So, I finally sent Haven up to bed at 5 hoping she would get some sleep. Grayson had already woken up and was sleeping in the couch. Haven went up and I laid down on the couch with Gray, foot to foot trying to share the big warm blanket. I finally dozed off around 5:30 with the split of the couch between my shoulder blades and no blanket from the waist up. Then at 6 am Haven was back, not sure why, but back to wake me and Gray up. So then I sent her back to bed since she was up and sick all night and got up and fed Gray breakfast.

So I am tired and sick and all I want to do is whine and moan, but that doesn't work here. Ryan will stop at the store on his way home and he will clean the bathroom, but then he needs to sleep since he has work tonight. I have switched the laundry, so he can put whatever he needs to in the wash, and have begun cleaning up the house. Dinner tonight will be black beans I started soaking last night, with seasoned ground beef and spanish rice served with lettuce, tomato and sour cream. Cheap, easy and healthy-well except Haven will get toast.

I have the stuff I need out for chocolate florentines. I will begin these in a few minutes and after Britt is up and eats, she can help me finish decorating and sort the laundry. We will just need to adjust how things get done today, no room to move what needs to be done.

A fate worse than torture

So it is 3:30 am and I am blogging, why you ask? Well, I went to bed at 10:30 as I felt crappy from my cold. At 12:30 I woke to Haven screaming, she had just thrown up all over the bathroom, I mean ALL OVER. Get her out of there and settled with a bucket, call husband who assures me he will clean it up when he gets home in the a.m. and I lock the kids out of that room. Go back to sleep and at 3 am wake to Haven throwing up,now in the bucket. Now downstairs, she is in the bathroom, I am on the couch and I realized my "cold" is now happily settled in my chest and ears, both if which hurt really really badly.

Home again!

It was a long drive but we are all home again, even got the dog picked up!

I have some work to do tonight and then tomorrow will be all about baking and decorating! There are threats of rain, but if I can, I will get most of the outside stuff up, as well as the last few indoor decorations. Then everything will be put back up except the ornaments for the tree we will get Thursday. That day Ryan will also hang the HUGE wreath over the garage.

Tomorrow I hope to get the chocolate chip cookies and some of the florentines baked, it will be quite the adventure :)

Still in NC and under the weather

We had a very nice Thanksgiving, and I hope you all did too!

I seem to have been bitten by a bug, I have a terrible sore throat and am stuffy and just feel crummy. Thankfully my parents are occupying the kids and I am laying in bed working. We will leave early tomorrow to get home and get the dog, then Sunday the kids and I will get cracking on the outside decorations:)

Safe travels!

Happy Thanksgiving

We made it safe and sound to NC and I only cried once (trust me, given the circumstances that is impressive!)

This year we have so much to be thankful for, steady jobs, wonderful children, healthy family and a strong marriage. While we have some tests coming up, namely Ryan's mom moving in, I am looking to it as a blessing. I have so much more to share, but the littles are hungry!

Trying to get out the door

So, the bags are packed, lunches are made and are in the cooler and the kid's have their blankets and stuffed animals on the front bench. I have a call starting in 10 minutes that will run until 11 when my next call begins. If all goes well, hubby will be home before the 11 am call and we can load the car and leave to drop the dog. If he isn't home by then, we will have to wait until noon and leave before THAT call! So far,all that is left is for me to get my clothes on, the cats food to be checked, the trash to go out and the dishwasher to be started. Not too shabby!

The day got brighter

So, we have been trying to get a vacation with our timeshare in Vermont. The plan was for March when I am off for Spring Break, but there was always an issue. Then we looked at summer, but we have something going on this summer and I wasn't sure how we would fit it in. Today we were confirmed for the week I wanted in March! Woohoo,I am so excited that we have the place booked and the family and I can go and enjoy one of my favorite places on earth.

Not as planned

So to say this morning did not go as planned is not doing it justice. We had a bad start, then the girls got off to school and I tried to get some stuff done around the house. Then Gray and I left to go to pictures, and all I wanted was a drink because my stomach was really upset. Well, of course the drive through was wrapped around the building. Finally we get down to the picture place and we are about 15 minutes early. I check in and ask, ASK, that they are running on time. They assure me they are, and Gray and I wait, and wait, and wait until it is 20 minutes past our appointment time, Gray looks a mess and he is almost in tears (well, we both were almost in tears). So I ask the girl at the counter who tells me that there is someone else before us-that means at least 20 minutes more, and was really nasty about it, so we left. Then I called and the manager was busy and was supposed to call back, but hasn't. Now I am really pissed since I need these pictures done and they wasted my time today. Here's the thing, if I wanted an appointment at 11, I would make one then, not bring my kid, have them waste my time, it become lunchtime and then have any expectation of a decent picture. Argggg. Now I am off to call them again to see if SOMEONE can actually be helpful.

Sad news

Recently my mother told me my uncle's youngest brother was sick with cancer. Today she told me he passed away. Uncle Bob was a really great guy, and while not my uncle, I remember him from many different family events. He was a lawyer, and right after law school he surprised his whole family by running off and joining the Peace Corp. After coming back and marrying, he began a very successful career. He wasn't very old, not even 60, and his two boys are only in their 20's. These young men are amazing, so incredibly bright and successful even at their young ages, and I know their father's death will devastate them. Tonight I think of that entire side of my family who all loved Uncle Bob, I hope they all find strength in their togetherness and that their love is carried to Bob where ever his spirit flies.

Pretty pretty

So I managed to get all my errands done, and the pedicure was so nice and indulgent!

After Gray ate lunch, he informed me that he needed to go see Dr. Tom, and since he has been coughing a bit,I ran him over there. Then we stopped to get the tomatoes I forgot this morning and then home. Did some housework and posts, all I have left is dinner and my paper, which is only two pages - I may even get some down time tonight. I am super sleepy, and really need to get the decorating going so I can be super Christmas mom, so the more I get done today, the more fun we can have decorating tomorrow after pictures.

Morning plans

So Emily is away, I am ahead of the game with the getting ready to go game, so what, pray tell, will I be doing this morning.....

Well, after dropping the kids off, I will first go to Giant and get more butter (Christmas baking-we are not butter addicts), then to CVS for batteries, then to get a pedicure (woohoooooo),then to Jiffy Lube for an oil change and then to Tom's to get my bones cracked :)

After all of this, I will get Gray from preschool, bring home home and feed him lunch. Then I will try to start the Christmas decorations. I think dinner will be soup and sandwiches since we don't want to leave with a fridge full of leftovers!

OK, off to get clothes on, run the monsters to school and start the errands!

Butter me up!

OK,so this may seem really silly to some people, but if you bake a lot, you will understand my sheer joy.

So the good brand name butter is on sale super cheap this week for only 1.99. That alone could make my heart race, but get this......I have 15 coupons for $1 off and 15 coupons for .55 off! I will be going tonight to get 6, then 6 more tomorrow and the last three on Tuesday. Butter freezes really well and I need it for baking and it is .99 cents a pound!

Just plain pooped!

I am exhausted! I know I have been busy, but this is out of hand, I could pass out right now! Thankfully all I need to do is maintain order in the house, make homemade mac and cheese for dinner and do some posts to my classes. I am hoping to snuggle up in bed early tonight and get some good sleep!

The kids all have school in the morning and I need to get the oil changed in the car and make my way down to Fredericksburg to get fabric. I am making my kiddos (and myself and Emily) flannel bed warmers since it has been so chilly. Just simple rice bags with lavender that can be warmed up and put into bed to keep everyone toasty. It is a surprise for the kids, so I need to go when they are at school tomorrow. Tomorrow afternoon I will start packing, and I will have a paper to write :(

Tuesday Gray and I will head back to Fredericksburg so we can get his pictures done. Then we will go to the farm and get the milk, then home for lunch and last minute getting ready details. Since I have calls all morning Wednesday, I need everything to be ready to go. When Ryan gets home and I finish my second call at noon, we will load up the car, drop the dog off and get on our way to NC.

Being we are going to be so busy, I really need to get to bed early!

You know what....

I got ALL my stuff done early! All that is left are the dishes, and there are only a few and they can hang until morning. I also washed the kid's coats, mittens and booster seat covers and got them back on so there is no rush in the morning. After dinner while Ryan gave baths, I ran out to grab my early edition of the paper and a peppermint mocha twist from Starbucks. I am feeling the holidays coming on.....

A busy bunch

We got a lot done today and I am happy with the progress so far. The Christmas decorations are waiting for us in the living room, and when we get home from NC they will be spreading joy through our house. We cleaned the car out and it is sparkling! We picked Ryan's car up from the shop. Some laundry was folded, and some put away. The kids coats and car seat covers are in the washer, and clothes for church are laid out for tomorrow. I finished my grading and posted one paper, only one short one left to write tonight. I need to go get the veggies ready to roast, we are having roasted veggies with basil, lemon and orzo for dinner. The fire is going, the dishes are done, and I am feeling pretty relaxed and ready for the evening. Maybe I will make the kids some hot cocoa and we will start looking over the decorations.

I have to say it....

I am so sick and tired of pissed off students emailing me because THEY didn't do the work right and then trying to THREATEN me with going to my boss. You know what I always say...go, email everyone you want, email the head of the school, you know what they will say...WE BACK UP THE FACULTY! Here is the thing, if you don't cite sources, it is plagiarism, and if I ask for sources, I AM DOING MY JOB! Oh, and don't tell me that it is because I don't "like" you because here is the thing, I don't really think about you...at all, on a personal level as I am there to teach you and evaluate you, I really don't care to be your friend or get to "know" you. We are not peers. Higher education is one of the few institutions where one person essentially judges the other, so why oh why do they think that emailing me an being a jerk is going to help them???

Secrets and Simple

I want everyone to know, that we have been yell free all day, and I am very happy! The whole atmosphere in the house is better, and while only Ryan and I are here right now, I know that our good moods will carry over to the kids when they get home. Grayson was super cute today when we got in the car to go to school, he asked if tonight was family meeting night, and I assured him it was. Tonight we will all sit down as a family to address the yelling problems, and then we will celebrate our new no yelling policies with a family movie night!

In addition to changing all of our communication processes, I have also been working with the girls on their song for church on Sunday. Grayson is supposed to sing as well, but my guess is he will stay planted on my lap and not go up to sing. The kids are all singing "Tis a Gift to be Simple" which is one of my favorite hymns and so fitting for this time of year. Haven sings loud and confident, Brittan quiet and reserved, but they both love the song and are excited to get dressed up to sing in front of the congregation with their friends.

One last thing......I have a little secret that I can't share until Christmas.....you can all wait, right? :)

Stop Yelling!!!!!

So, it is really sad when you see a major problem in your family that you caused. See, we have always kind of been yellers, but lately it has gotten really, really bad. Now it seems all we do all day long is yell, me at the kids, the kids at each other, me at ryan, ryan at me, ryan at the kids, the kids at us, etc. So tomorrow I am quiting, I am going to try not to yell unless it is an emergency (think HOT! or TORNADO!) I am going to try to convince the hubby not to yell, and maybe by setting a GOOD example, the kids will stop yelling too. I want a house where we are kind to each other, and we need some changes. This is our pre-Christmas resolution, hopefully we will keep it and this good habit will replace the bad.

Weepy days

I have had a bit of a weepy day. The day started out OK except I had a headache and hubby was crabby, ok so was I. Kids got off, I ran to the store, came home and was upset that what I asked to be done wasn't. Headache lasted all day, even now it is still making itself known behind my left eye. It seemed everything made me cry today, sometimes that is just what you need to do when everything is hard, shed a few tears and get the work done. Now I am just trying to get dinner on the table, have hubby get the decorations down and spackle the last wall that needs paint in the kitchen and maybe I will fold some clothes after my call tonight.

At least the weepiness seems to have left, and I know that the next few days will be filled with super fun stuff like power washing and raking leaves!!! At least when we get back from NC, I can get the house dolled up for Christmas :)

Getting ready for the holidays

So, we are gearing up for Thanksgiving and then the rapid rush for Christmas!

Tomorrow I will start getting the decorations down and we will get the living room together for the tree. It will be a mad rush to get everything done, but I really want to get the house decorated before Chelle comes on the 6th, so rush, rush, rush.....

So, can someone tell me what went wrong???

Every fall it is an adjustment getting back into work at PT school, getting the kids onto a school schedule, etc, but usually by October, we are doing just fine. This year, no dice! I am just as messed up today as I was in August, and the only consilation I have is that it will only last a few more weeks. So, what went wrong???

OK, well, I know that we started off bad with Haven being diagnosed with the seizures and the testing that we needed to have done. Then the Weds/Fri schedule for my classes really stinks as I never have two days at home with help so I never get a chance to relax. Add to this, Grayson started preschool. Plus my classes I am taking have been really, really, awful.

All I can hope is that the few weeks I have off help recharge my batteries and that next term goes a bit smoothers. Maybe having mu MIL here will help, maybe she will clean up, or get the kids out of my hair or something to take the pressure off. I am back on the Mon/Weds class schedule, so I will have my Thursdays and Fridays at home with hubby :)

Ah well, a few more weeks and the craziness will be done...just imagine, I am going to have three weeks of no school and no teaching, whatever will I do? Oh yea, I have a week's worth of company.

Papers and Spelling Words

OK, so my plan to write the one paper by dinner was achieved, but it took ALL DAY! Needless to say, I am in for a long night with the second paper. I did get some of my work work done, and dinner is cooking, although the pork roast isn't done yet and it is now after 5. I guess while we wait, I can map out my second paper...where did my calm, fun day at home go?

Chilly weather

It is very, very chilly out today. Thankfully we have a fire to keep us toasty, and the sun is shining.

I am trying to write one of two papers due today, but am being distracted by Grayson and his many demands. My goal is to have one paper done and posted by dinner, as well as my regular work, so I can finish writing tonight. Tomorrow I will drop kids at school, high tail it to the farm, then do my call and get ready for class. Just another busy, busy day!

Small breaks

So, with everything having been so hectic lately, today was a welcome change. Even though I had Haven home and she had a doctor's appointment, and I currently have two extra kids here, it has been a good day!

Haven and I dropped Britt and Gray at school, then she and I met Emily for a quick coffee/tea and a bagel. She and I came home, I sent a few emails and straightened up then off to the doctor where we were told NO STREP :) just a virus. Went and grabbed Grayson, Maggie and their friend from school and high tailed it to D. Tom's where he made my back feel so much better :) Off for lunch with Emily, then the kids and I came home.

We made a nice fire and I did the dishes, vacuumed up, switched laundry, cleaned cat litter (yuck) and have some pumpkin muffins baking. Now I will make a pot of tea and do a little work before it is time to start dinner. My plans for tomorrow are to stay home and stay warm, it is supposed to be frigid.

Another sickie

So, Haven is home from school today and scheduled to see the doc at 10:40. She is complaining of a sore throat and it looks pretty icky in there, so we are going to see if it is strep. Grayson also is a tad under the weather. He is coughing some and seems like his nose is getting clogged, these are big problems for my boy as this is when all the trouble starts. He is at school since he has no fever, but tonight he will do a breathing treatment and we will use saline to keep his sinuses clear, I am NOT going to the hospital this year.

Otherwise, a few errands to run, plus have the littles here for lunch time. Then I must find a way to see dr tom today, Grayson will need an adjustment and Haven and I could use one too. Off to plan, at least it is a slower day.

Dinner...a nightly production

Ask any mom out there and she will tell you that dinnertime, or better yet, the time she is preparing dinner, is the worst time of day for children. So while trying to cook, there are often hysterics, injuries, general clingyness and whining...every single night. Now, having been a mom for almost 8 1/2 years, I know this, and I try to start dinner on the early side as it gives me more time to cook, and a slightly better chance only one kid will fall apart.

Tonight I got going early since I knew that the dinner I was making required my attention. We are having sausage roll or sausage en croute. Essentially it is sausage, I use mild italian, cooked with peppers and onions then chopped up in the food processor with cheese and seasoning. You add in diced fresh tomato and roll it in puff pastry. Now seriously, has anything ever not tasted fantastic when rolled in puff pastry?

It is a really tasty meal and the whole family will eat it, but I don't make it often since I need to dirty the food processor and I try not to feed the family puff pastry too often or they will come to expect it.

I am happy to say that dinner was made without meltdowns, thanks to the play doh table IN the kitchen so that the kids could keep their eyes on me. I am also baking a pie for dinner, sorry store bought tonight, I just didn't have the time and there were pie requests. So, after I do the dishes (bleck) I can make a big salad to go with the sausage roll and feed the tribe.

I may in fact cry

OK, so we made it to church and I was helping out with both Britt and Gray's classes as they were combined today. Grayson was AWFUL, which is to be expected since he has been awful for the last two months. After church we stayed and had some snack, then I took the kids to lunch, which was super nice I thought. So, while at lunch Grayson was AWFUL. OK, then to the store where, you guessed it, he was AWFUL and AWFUL on the ride home and since we have gotten here!

I am not sure what his issue is, but he is just being bad, not listening, doing things he knows he shouldn't, talking back, etc. I am sure he is testing me, and boy did that blow up for him today. See he is my baby, so he has never seen me really, really fed up and mad, well he did today and he was really yelled at and sent to bed. I mean, I really yelled at him, told him his bad behavior needed to stop now and that he could no longer be like this. He has had me on the breaking point for weeks, and I really need for the behavior to improve or I may lose my mind.

Now I am exhausted, I still need to get some work done, do the dishes, straighten the house and cook dinner, not to mention write that paper. Can I please just take a nap?

and we're off....

So we are up and dressed, kids are fed and I vacuumed a bit. I am throwing back the coffee and the kids are bringing down their laundry. In about an hour, we leave to go to church and if all goes well, I will FINALLY be there to assist in Grayson's class. After church, we will make a quick stop at the store to grab a few things we need (dog food, puff pastry, etc) and a few things that are just rockin deals (stuffing, pudding, etc)

We will then head home, get the kids lunch, straighten the house and do the laundry, same old same old.

I do have to finish some grading today and write a paper, but that can wait until tonight!

A good day

So, I was up from 2 am until after 6 am, but then hubby let me sleep until 9 (actually he tried to get me to sleep longer).

After getting up and cleaning up after the family, Haven and I ran to Rite Aid where we scored a killer deal on a toaster, which is great since I have been shopping for one forever! Then we ran over to Shoppers and met up with Em and her girls. We grabbed a few essentials and a few non-essentials like the pomegranate the hubby requested. Then home to feed the kids, get some chores done, organize my coupons, and have a lovely long chat with Chelle, too bad my kids kept interrupting! I am super excited that we will see her, her hubby and her step son in December when she comes to town for business, I simply cannot wait!

Then I fed the kids dinner, jerk chicken, corn on the cob and roasted butternut squash. I just did some grading, got the kids clothes for church together and cleaned up from dinner. Now if the kids would head to bed, I can get a bit more grading done and head to bed myself!

Hey it's 5 am!!!

and I have been up since 2!

See, I was passed out sleeping by 11 and then I guess hubby fell asleep downstairs and at 2 came up. I woke up when he came up and well, when that happens I usually end up creating some sort of anxiety and keeping myself awake. So now I have done a bunch of work, sent some emails, and planned the day-which includes an option to nap!

Torn

OK, I have a few drinks in me and so I decided to open my soul a bit for everyone.

Here are things I am torn up about:

1. Is having MIL here good or bad? Seems it depends on the day for me. It is good that she will be able to help with the kids and that if for some reason I went back to a more full time job, it would be another grownup in the house.

2. Do I REALLY want another baby or not? That seems to depend on the day, one day I desperately want another one, the next day I am relieved that I am not expecting. I guess that just means I can make due whatever happens.

3. Do I want to move or not? Well, I really want land, loads of it, and the ability to raise and grow our own....BUT we have good friends here and have made a life for the kids and ourselves. Right now, Ryan and I are hoping we can buy a beat up little house on loads of land within five hours from here. Since I don't work on site anywhere in the summer, the kids and I would summer there, grow and raise food etc., and Ryan could come every other weekend. If we had that land, we could have all the things we can't get at this house, like apple groves and a pool, so it would be the best of both worlds. Plus we can totally fix anything in a house at this point, so we could fix the place up, add on when we could, etc.

4. Do I want a FT "real" job or not? Well, I want the MONEY from a FT regular gig, but I would HATE losing my flexible schedule. Maybe if I get this darn doctorate done I can get a FT teaching gig on campus, then I am free during breaks and my schedule is a lot more lax than a "real" job.

OK, that is all I have to share, I am not good at sharing, ask Emily, curse of being the youngest ;)

Saving Face

I have been tough to live with the last month, quick to yell and crabby. I know it and I have apologized to my family, although my grumpiness is justified and some of it is the result of misbehaving children and a husband who was not responding well to stress. See, I am busy and a bit overwhelmed, the teaching on Weds night and Friday afternoon messes with my days off and my to get things done with help from Ryan. Add to that major household breakages (water heater) car issues (tires) general stress over money and the economy and the fact that in less than two months my mother in law moves in......well, you can see why I am grumpy.

I know that it will all be OK, and that we will find a way to live together, but I hate change and the time leading up to the big event is the most stressful for me. Ahhh, I think I need to go make a pitcher of margaritas, that will help :)

I have a bunch of smarty pants

So we finally got Brittan's report card, Ryan went up to the school for her conference today and thy had so many nice things to say. She had a great report card, as did Haven, both reading well above level. I am very proud of my girls, they are hard workers and excellent students. I cannot wait to see how Gray does when he enters school as he is doing quite well at the preschool level.

Progress

It is now 12:12 and we finally got the kitchen border done. I also emptied our closet and Ryan and I sorted through everything. I got all, YES ALL, of my clothes folded and put away, and Ryan swears after lunch he will go fold and put his away. It may not seem like much, but since the kittens were born, we have had the closet in shambles, and now everything is neat and clean. Best of all, I now can grab any winter clothes I may need and all my super snuggly pajamas are folded and tucked away waiting for me.

The big clean did have a nasty side effect, and that would be even more dirty laundry to wash. So far I am pushing it through, and any clean kids clothes are waiting for the girls to fold tomorrow afternoon.

Still on the plan, I need to do dishes, switch laundry, vacuum and make meatballs for supper. Husband even offered to go to school to meet with Brittan's teacher since we missed conferences. Such a huge relief since I have an 8:30 call and I am super tired. So far, hubby is being pretty helpful and I really appreciate it.

Can we do it, gosh I HOPEso!

OK, it is just after 8:30 and once a few cups of coffee have been loaded into me, I am heading up to attack that closet. I hope it gets done today because it has been on the list forever and is holding up other major projects. Then if that gets done, I will attack the growing pile of laundry (I hear they caught on to the dishes and are planning a revolt) and finishing the last spot of painting in the kitchen.

Time to chug that coffee....

I need to complain

I am tired, really tired and a bit annoyed. My days are long, longer when Gray wants to stay up all night. It is 11:30 and I just finished my work and I really need to clean up the house, but it will have to wait. I will get up tomorrow, get the girls out the door, clean up, and then attack the closets, because I have to. No quiet down day, no rest for the weary, I will work on my only day when I have a husband home and only 1 kid. What will hubby do? He will do three things after I annoy him into it, then he will lay around and complain. Nice sounding day tomorrow huh. Ok, I am angry and tired.

Tired, gloomy and illness..must be winter in VA

So Gray is under the weather again, and he was very restless and up most of the night. It is now 3 pm and he has been sleeping since 11 am, I guess he was tired and needed the sleep. He missed school since he had a fever, so he and I ran to the farm and as a nice mommy, I got him a donut, he didn't finish it which is a sure sign he isn't feeling well since my boy LOVES donuts.

I have been busy working today and will head to class this evening, but it is gloomy outside and all I want to do is nap. My girlies will be home soon and I need to get dinner cooking (homemade waffles, bacon and fruit) Good thing I made some coffee, I need the pick me up!

Off to guzzle coffee and try to get some more work done. Plus the dishes are looking at me and giving me the evil eye, I guess they want to get washed.

Update on the day

So, we have had a reasonably decent day. I am still waiting on information to finish that paper, if all else fails, I will just do it myself.

The kids have played outside a lot, but now Grayson isn't feeling well and is running a fever. I have him settled on the couch, hopefully rest and Tylenol is all he will need. I have gotten my work work done for the day, with the exception of grading which I will start in a bit. The house is pretty much in order with the exception of laundry, but that will be assigned to the hubby on Thursday or Friday. I have a plan for dinner and a lemon cake that is heading into the oven for dessert. I would be on track for a quiet, restful evening if only my team would send me their work. Argh.

No school fun

OK, so I am trying to head into today with a good attitude. So far, I have almost all of the information from my team for the paper, although the person who sent me information last night did not include anything I asked for, sigh.....

The kids had a good breakfast and are bundled up playing outside. We have a nice fire going and I am about to get my first cup of coffee, hooray!

I do have a few musts. I must roast more coffee. I must shower. I must vacuum the house. I must make the girls fold clothes. I must do dishes. I must complete this paper. I must work.

I also have a few things I want to do, and these include making a few loaves of bread and figuring out what the heck I can do different with my leftover chicken for dinner. Off to drink coffee and perk up!

Following the Leader

OK, so we all know, doctoral work, etc etc etc.

Right now my class is heavily dependent on team projects and this week I am lucky enough to be team leader. I have never in my life had so many problems! No one can get work in on time, or stick to a page requirement. No one is emailing back, or editing and I am at my wits end. Did I mention that there is another paper due tomorrow and I only have half the information? Do they think I have all day to edit their work? I don't want a bad grade in this class, and I HATE relying on other people for my grade, as they are not as concerned as I am it seems.

OK, off to edit more.

Terrible, awful, very bad morning

Let's start with that I am overwhelmed, exhausted and just at my wits end. I do not believe that this excuses what I am about to share, but I just needed to explain the background.

I have been busy, REALLY busy, work has had me putting in 60-70 hours a week, add to that classes for me and taking care of a house and three kids. I have been begging, pleading for help, for my family to do something to make the house neat and clean again like I keep it.

I reached my breaking point this morning when I went to wake my girls and found both their room and Grayson's room trashed, and I mean destroyed beyond recognition. To make matters worse, they had shoved, yes SHOVED, paper behind and around their beds, which makes it a fire hazard. Had their father been in there last night, YES, did he make them clean it up, NO!

Then, in trying to locate Gray's sneakers, I see the playroom was equally trashed and destroyed. I have two other little ones coming home with me this afternoon, and now I had no where to let them play!

So, I put everyone in the car for school, the girls were crying because they had been put on restriction, so I took Gray to school first knowing the girls would be late. Then I decided, they are off tomorrow and they can stay home today and do the clean up. I know, I know, whip me, but sometimes school can wait. I know, I know, it is just a mess and they could do it later, but I don't have time later, to be honest, I don't have time NOW, so school can wait. Yeah yeah, school is important and it is their education blah blah blah, ah well I am getting my doctorate so I am well aware that school is important, and I am pretty sure I can catch my 3rd and 1st grader up on anything they missed today. Was it the best decision, maybe not, but when they and my husband can catch on that I work TWO jobs and go to school full time, maybe we won't come to this.

So, they are cleaning, I just did some of the massive amounts of work I need to do, I need to go get the three littles, feed them and figure out a new plan. I did talk to Emily about using the red, yellow and green light like they use at school. Except here it everyone starts at red, and then if homework, chores and general behavior is good you can move up to green. Screw self esteem.

My four year old sent me to bed!

He woke up from a dream and was itchy (daddy forgot his allergy meds!) so I dosed him and told him to go to bed. He then insisted that he couldn't sleep alone and that I could take my computer upstairs so he could sleep in my room! Needless to say, I was too tired to fight, and he is now snoozing away next to me. The things we do to get a break!

Emily

stop stealth posting to me!!!

You are playing games with my mind!

Sunday quietness

We didn't make it to church again today as I was feeling really terrible last night and this morning. We have had a quiet day, the kids had a nice lunch and I am trying to get some things done around the house. Even with the slow day, I haven't gotten nearly enough chores done, but there is always tomorrow!

We are having a yummy dinner, roast chicken, stuffing, roasted butternut squash and sweet potatoes, biscuits and applesauce...yummy!

Trying to find hope

It is our tough time of the year, December/January and August are when we struggle the most financially. I always try to prepare and while on paper we look okay, I never know what is just around the corner. Financial stability is tough in today's times, even for those of us who are considered fortunate.

In addition to my money stress, my mother in law will be moving in with us in December or January. She needs our help, and I am happy to give it, but worry about what it will mean for our family dynamics, plus I am concerned I will have to stop changing my clothes in the family room and walking around half naked ;) We are happy she is coming, and the kids are very excited, but change is tough for me.

I am also thinking of applying for another full time teaching position. I love my FT gig, and it allows me to be home a lot, but I don't make a lot of money and feel I could do more for the family. I guess it will be left in the hands of fate.

So very crazy!

So, yesterday was busy, busy, busy. I finally made it home, after having fun running around with Em and Maggie, at 3:30. The girls came home and I was working on getting ready for work when it happened.....my laptop died. Apparently the internal charger thing doesn't work, so I have no power. The problem was that I NEEDED a laptop for class last night and our other one doesn't have Powerpoint. Thankfully Emily was super nice and let me take her laptop to class. My company overnighted a new case and it will be here tomorrow, so I will be up and running.

I got home late last night and then was up to 4 am trying to get work done on our desktop that doesn't have the programs I need. I slept on the couch in the family room until 7:20 when Haven was up for school, and I have been busy working, cleaning and getting things done. Tomorrow I have class, then the Fallons are coming for a game night :) Then Saturday I am sleeping in!!!

Butterflies

So, I have to be the first to admit that this, like the past few presidential elections, was not one where I was 100% behind a candidate. Being that we are precariously placed, our economy is poor and people are suffering, neither candidate appeared to be a knight in shining armor. Regardless, I went out and cast my vote, and when I stood in front of that ballot, I had butterflies in my stomach. While it appears that the person I voted for will win, I am still concerned for our nation. I worry about what a Democratic majority means for us, and I want to see a change in our country, for the better.

I am sitting here, giddy with excitement to see the results of the American people's choices. I am so proud of this nation, and that people were so moved to get out and cast a vote. What a wonderful indication of the desires of the people, that all want to see a new administration and to see a change in our world, regardless of whose name was on their ballot. The joy I have to be part of a presidential election with the first black candidate, it overwhelms me and makes my heart full.

My darling children sat in chairs waiting patiently for me to vote today. We have talked extensively about what a blessing this right is to have, and I have told them all that they will have that same right given to them on their 18th birthday. I could see on my girl's faces today that they got the seriousness of voting, as they sat there and waited, calming their brother and telling him how important it was that we were there. I am so filled with hope that we will see the change that has been promised. I know what a great nation this is, I see it everyday in the people, now I want to see it in our leadership.

It all comes together

It has been a good day, everything seemed to just fall into place. This morning I was able to get my call done, get the kids out the door and we went to vote. Thankfully we were quick at the polls and we went and had a yummy lunch. Then I grabbed my free cup of joe and we headed home. After getting home, I was super productive and got all of my grading done for PT school, half of it for FT school, made cheese, cleaned up and did the dishes and laundry. Dinner is now cooking and one of the two papers is completed. Tonight I need to run 5 calls with new faculty and work on the other paper I have due. If I am SUPER together, I will be able to get the kid's lunches made since we need to be out the door a 8 am. Whew!

Vote vote vote vote!!!

So, I just finished sending the email to my students urging them to go out and vote, and I urge all of you to do the same. I know the lines are long, but this opportunity only comes around every four years, so go, wait, and vote!

I will e heading out with three kids, fully prepared to stand in line, after I have my call at 8:30. If we need to stand there all day, we will, and I will tell them over and over again how lucky we are to have this right (something I will stress to my girls) and that I refuse to not go out and lend my voice to the masses.

It will be an interesting evening!

Holding it all together

So, it has been a rough few days, but somehow I am holding it together. I am wading through my work, and keeping up with the basic housekeeping. The kids are getting fed, and somehow I am getting it done. To say my life is a delicate balance is a serious understatement. Thankfully, I do pretty well under pressure, and while I know it won't let up until the end of the week, somehow it will get done.

Tomorrow is Election Day so the kiddos are off from school. Currently I have 5 calls scheduled (that is at least 2 1/2 hours) plus I need to vote and make it to CVS at some point. If I can keep moving, I will only have 15 papers left to grade tomorrow for PT school, plus a paper to write and I will start grading for FT school. In addition, I need to carve out a half hour tomorrow to make cheese, and I need to pack up the pumpkin I processed yesterday. It is a lot, but manageable, minus any major issues.

I know how crazy my world is, but I am thankful every day that my kids don't know how much I work around their schedule. To them, I am here being a mom most of the time, and while I will tell them when I am on a call or working that I need some quiet, I am still here is they need me. I am ready to be done with school, and with two years to go, it is great to see an end in site.

It is still crazy

So, dropped the girls off at school, was almost to Grayson's school when they called to tell me Brittan was throwing up....again. So dropped the boy, came and got the girl, ran home and did course checks, got the CSA and got Gray. Since getting home, I have fed them, Britt got peppermint tea and toast, I am hoping it helps settle her tummy, and I did the dishes. Now I MUST get working on grading for PT school, I need to get through 20 papers today. I also must write a paper tonight after I go to Parent/Teacher conferences. Oh did I mention I have calls with new faculty? Please let tomorrow be slow and quiet so I can get stuff done!

A bunch of Halloweenies

OK, so since no one is vomiting right now, I will post some pics from Halloween.

I never did get a decent shot of Gray by himself, and how grown up does Haven look, I need to lock her up right NOW!

Moving moving moving

OK, so I am moving right along. Got all my work work done for FT school, did one run to the store, did dishes and processed two out of the three pumpkins. I still need to work on laundry and grade papers for PT school, and figure out dinner. I may just feed the family leftovers since no one really ate last night, or I may take some of that pumpkin and make it into pumpkin soup.

While standing there chopping pumpkin today, a memory came upon me which had nothing to do with the pumpkin, but reminded me of why I am who I am. I remember being back on LI and it was either Valentine's Day or Saint Patrick's Day and my beau at the time and I were going out with a friend of his from college. This friend was the SNL version of a guy from Long Island, greasy and stinking of cologne, and I remember that it amused me since so few of the guys I knew were the stereotypical LI guy-and I lived there my whole life! So after having a crap time and heading home, I kept thinking how that was not where I belonged, I shouldn't be in some crappy bar with those people. I am not sure why this memory came upon me, I do know that I was thinking of two different exes while chopping pumpkin, knowing one would have admired the task and one would have made me feel like crap for being cheap, maybe that is where it came from.

I am glad to know that my husband was the one who went out and got me the pumpkins for super cheap, knowing that it would make me happy and that he and the kids would benefit from all of the good food that will come from those pumpkins. I am happy this is where I ended up and that I am understood here.

Just remembered

We set the clocks back...woohooo, I may just be able to catch up on some things!

Even more behind

So, if I was overwhelmed and behind a few days ago, I would have to say I am buried now. Between the two (so far) sick kids, Halloween, and other things that have come up, I am really behind on everything. There are two enormous piles of clean laundry that must be folded, and an equally big pile of dirty that must be washed. The house is ransacked, no one is on a good eating schedule so I am constantly feeding someone, I have a ton of work to do and I am exhausted.

So, I will do some work work now, then get up and put the canner and dehydrator away for the winter (hooray), make a batch of cheese, switch laundry, fold the kid's clothes and try to get Haven to put them away for me, I will vacuum and dust the main level of the house and mop all the floors to disinfect. Then, at some point today I need to start grading the 75 all essay exams. At least the kids only have a half day on Monday and Tuesday they are off, that means I have a few little helpers.

Beat down

I am just exhausted, today took it out of me.

All three kids are in bed, and I am hoping the worst of it has passed for Brittan. Still waiting to see if Haven or I get sick, I would assume that by tomorrow night we would be sick if we were getting it.

I am calling today quits and heading to bed, Ryan stayed home to help out, so if anyone else goes down, her will be there.

That would be two kids down

Britt just started getting sick. This is the weirdest stomach flu ever, they always hit at night, but this one hits at dinnertime! I guess we will see if/when Haven gets it!

Pumpkins and weather

So, my husband went out and picked up pumpkins for me, they were all you could carry (by the wagon) for 5 dollars. Smart husband that he is, he only got me two as I am the one who has to clean, cook and freeze the pumpkin puree. We already have enough for four batches of pumpkin muffins, so some of this will be made into puree and some will be peeled and chopped into chunks to be roasted with butternut squash and sweet potatoes as a hearty side dish.

The weather here is going crazy, today was supposed to be a high of 70, now they are saying 78. This week was supposed to be cool and mild, now we are looking at the high sixties and seventies! I hate when the weather jumps around, if it is fall, I want fall, no messing about. Now I must go finish the apple butter I am making, when husband gets home I will have him get me the canner and jars, then the apples will be finished....just in time for pumpkin.

Those days

You know those days when you know it is going to be terrible because you are already sobbing at 9 am? Yep, it is one of those days.

New day, new way

Husband informed me that I do too much for everyone else, actually he tells me this often and I usually just brush it aside. Needless to say, I do too much for my family and they don't appreciate it, and I find it spills out into all other aspects of my life, personal and work. When I then find that I do not get the same respect or compassion shown, I get upset as I believe I should be treated as I treat others. The realization that the whole "do unto others" theory only works if you can accept that you will only get back what the other is willing to give.