Mission completed

Ah, made it through NaBloPoMo....good.

Saw the doc today, everything is going along as planned.  Currently doing a million last minute things, making cheese to use up extra milk, making a veggie lasagna for dinner, working on lots of laundry and do the general clean up that is needed around here.  Hoping to get everything done so that I can retire to my room after dinner and actually relax a bit!

This is going to probably be my last blog post for a while, I feel I need to go dark for a bit, wait for Finn to come, nest, dote on my littles and then welcome our new member.  See you soon!

Not good to scare someone this pregnant

I just had the scariest moment of my life.  My husband had Teagan and was getting ready to climb over the baby gate we use to create baby jail holding her so he could change her stinky diaper.  Something happened and his foot got caught and he started to trip and fall....and stumble....holding my baby....towards the glass doors.  My god I began to freak as I watched it in slow motion, they fell against the doors (on top of the poor Newfie) and I leapt over that damn gate to get to them.  Teagan started crying, but she was absolutely fine, my husband held her tight the whole time and protected her with his arms...not a bump on the girl.  Now the husband's hand got hurt a little and the Newfie got squished, but holy crappola that was so scary to watch!  My husband is a big guy, over 6' 2" so you can only imagine my fears that he or Teagan would be going through the glass door or that he would somehow lose his grip on her, land on a limb funny, etc.  Thankfully they are both fine, Teagan got her diaper changed by her dad as I sat hyperventilating and is now going down for her nap. NOT a good moment, but so happy they are OK and that he held onto that baby so tightly, what a good Daddy.

Tree is done

It was a hard start to the morning, but we made it out to get the tree and then went and grabbed Five Guys for lunch.  Home to a rougher afternoon, somehow we made it through dinner and decorating the tree.  I am just thankful the tree is up and off my list...tomorrow I will do the rest of the decorations in the house.

Today is our feast

Being that the husband worked on Thanksgiving, we will be having our feast tonight.  I like to cook, but I am a week out from delivering and to be honest, I am wishing I had ordered one of those pre-cooked meals, although my family would have complained since their favorites would be missing.


My turkey just entered the oven coated in ample amounts of butter and fresh chopped herbs.  I just mixed up the cornbread stuffing, we like it with leeks, carrots and water chestnuts and more fresh herbs.  I still need to peel and chop white potatoes for mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes for sweet potato souffle and prep the broccoli which is the green veggie the kids requested.  Last but not least, rolls and pie...lots of pie with fresh whipped cream.  I wish the hubby was awake to help me, wrangling the kids and cooking a huge meal while trying to keep the house clean and work is a big job, but he worked his last shift until Christmas last night, so I will have lots of extra help around the house this week as we prepare for my parents to come into town. Interesting that his leave begins before mine!

I need some of that five hour energy stuff

but I am thinking it would be  bad idea.

I am wiped the hell out every day by noon.  I never got a nap on Ryan's days off last week and have had a few hard nights this week, so I am dead tired.  The end.

For all this I am truly grateful

What a year it has been!  I am a lucky soul and have much to be thankful for....

Of course my children, they are amazing little beasts, diverse in personality, and my reason for getting up each and every day. I am thankful for their good health, their love of one another, and their sweet and kind dispositions.  I am also thankful that many, many days they are real, normal kids who are too loud, too whiny and too needy, because otherwise they would not be human :)

I am thankful that Finn will be born soon.  I cannot wait to meet him and introduce him to his siblings who have been waiting to finally meet their baby brother.  I am also looking forward to feeling slightly less huge and tired, and I am ready to take on the adventure of #5.

I am incredibly thankful for my husband.  That we fought, tooth and nail, through the hard early years together and have come out on top.  That we share the same dreams and hope for our lives, and that he is an incredible father to our children and perfectly fills in the gaps that I leave with them.  He can talk me down, bring me up, make me laugh and make things right, and I am lucky that we chose to stay together and have this amazing life.

I am thankful for the health of my family and that my husband's family has not yet imploded...trust me, that is a huge thing to be thankful for here!

I am grateful for the roof over our heads, the food in our bellies and the secure jobs that we have. I am very thankful that I am working on my dissertation and that the end of my education is in sight, and that we have made choices as a family that will help us make our dreams come true in the next few years.

I am eternally grateful for the people we share our life with, and for having the strength to see that what I know to be right and just is what is best for my family.  As I look forward at our lives, I see that the choices we make, from jobs to friends to physical location all weave together, and is what makes us strong or weak as a family unit. I am thankful we made the choices to be strong.

Mixer=love

I cook...a lot.  I have an old Sunbeam mixer that I have had for years and years and I hate it because it has almost no power, about the same as a hand mixer which takes up less space and is what I have been using.  The hand mixer is OK for some stuff, but for pizza dough it doesn't work and for thick doughs like bread and peanut butter cookies, the poor motor sounds like a dying cat, and the Sunbeam just doesn't have the power and is not worth lugging out.


Obviously I have been coveting a Kitchen Aid Mixer for quite some time, not the less expensive home use one, but the big, fancy colored one with all the snazzy attachments.  Today I decided to go for it since I found an awesome deal at Kohls :)  I got the mixer of my dreams, plus three teacher gifts shipped for just about $260 bucks with 50 bucks in Kohls cash coming to me, 10 bucks in eBates rewards and a 30 mail in rebate......that is 170 total for my dream mixer PLUS the teacher gifts!  I am so excited :)

So it begins....

the great holiday season!

Today the baby and I braved the crowds at Wegman's, I figured it was safer to try today with just her than tomorrow with everyone.  I had a horrible migraine this morning when I woke up and it was still hanging about when we got there so I stopped to grab a coffee for me and a croissant for Teagie to see if I could stave off the headache.  The lady at the coffee bar was so sweet and complimented my cutie pie and asked what we were having, so of course I answer "Boy!" and she commented how perfect a boy and a girl how nice, to which I response..."and a girl and a girl and a boy, my three bigger kids are at school" with a big smile.  She laughed and then said, "Well that IS perfect!"  and I have to say I agree!

Teagie and I procured the goodies for Thursday, which will be appetizers for dinner since the hubby works as well as the rest of the fixin's for Saturday which will be our Thanksgiving dinner as a family.  I also have way too much milk on hand and I am due to get an order on Friday, so I am making cheese tomorrow and will make a double veggie lasagna, one for dinner and one for the freezer for after Finn is born.  My kids love veggie lasagna, and I love that it is full of good stuff :)

Finished up at Weggie's and then we met the hubby for lunch.  Had a delicious and filling lunch and came home to put away groceries and get some chores done, then out again when the big kids got home to run around some more!

Tomorrow will be a cleaning day, and Thursday will be a lounging day full of parades, cinnamon rolls, appetizers and movies snuggled on the couch.  It even looks to be cold enough to have a crackling fire in the fireplace.  The only thing that would make it better would be if the hubby was off too, but after his Friday shift he is off until Christmas to enjoy family time and help with the newest addition.  We are so lucky to have all that we do, to have a warm and safe home, to have healthy children and to be a close family full of love and chaos, is there anything better than that?

Tylenol is like tic tacs

I have a cold....I know you know since I keep whining about it, but it is one of those behind your eyes and in your sinuses colds that makes you want to take the heavy cold meds, and I can't because little Finn is still on board.  Add to it that I woke up at 3 am this morning and couldn't sleep due to the congestion, and the fact I had a doctor's appointment, and well, by 11 I was unhappy.  Thankfully the hubby is off so I took a nice two hour nap, and while my eyes are still watery and my nose all stuffy, I am at least not falling down tired.

OB appointment was status quo except the doc had a hard time getting the baby's heartbeat to register well because of his position.  When I asked how he was laying, the doc responded that it was hard to tell since he is so big and taking up all the room in there....yeah, I can kind of tell.  Made my last appointment for next week and hope to get the hospital registration done in the next few days....and we are officially in business to have a baby!

Just got the first wood delivery of the season, which is funny because it is almost 70 degrees outside, but the weather people assure me that it will be highs in the low 50's after tomorrow with lows in the 30's, to me, that is fire weather.  Ryan also may have sold his old car, the Saturn, that has been hanging in the garage for the last year.  I am super excited since this is found money and we are planning to buy a nice new Digital SLR for ourselves.  We NEVER get  ourselves anything, I mean we get stuff for the family and clothes, etc., but this is an nice indulgence in a want.  Also due to the generosity of my parents this year, we may blow some of Ryan's annual bonus on a new TV for the family room...watch out world, we are sloooooowly catching up!

OK, off to blow my nose and help the hubby get the Christmas decorations down!

Today....

Did not go as planned, since the cheeriness quickly wore off, but somehow we made it.

Some of the chores got done.

My cold settled in my sinuses and made me not happy at all, in fact, it made me weepy and cranky.

Grayson had a blast at the birthday party.

I learned a good friend's dad passed away and I wish I could be there to love on her and her family at the wake, but I cannot travel to NY this week.

I made a decent dinner, and the kids ate all my creamed spinach.

My husband went to two Starbucks to get me a Peppermint Mocha, one was out of syrup the other couldn't make hot drinks :(

Teagan started singing today, and she can carry a sweet tune, albeit without words.

My cold meds have kicked in and I am feeling slightly more human and so thankful that I am not sneezing as much since every sneeze brought on contractions.

Going to bed and just need to survive the day tomorrow and then looking forward to cooking and eating the turkey that is defrosting in the fridge and hanging out with my wonderful family.

Damn the trees

Well, the cold has taken hold of many of us, but we are all pretty cheery this morning so I am hoping that is a good sign :)

I had big plans for the week, BIG plans, and they have been foiled by the Christmas Tree Farm!  I wanted Ryan to go cut down the tree tomorrow so we could get it decorated Tuesday, a little early this year, but I want the house all sparkly before I deliver.  Sadly the farm doesn't open until the weekend after Thanksgiving :(  I guess we will have to go that Sunday morning and get the tree done that night.  Tomorrow the hubby can get the decorations down and I can deck all the other nooks and crannies while waiting for my tree.  Then I can go to work and make my goal of teaching through Thanksgiving.

Baby slave

Know what happens in this house when you are so loud that you repeatedly wake the sleeping baby who is super crabby?  Yep, you are the baby slave and are forced to spend your day doting on her and making her happy.  Good incentive to stop screaming when the baby is napping don't you think?

We are the survival stage

Well, I have a cold, a really nasty chest cold with a wicked sore throat. It has been coming on the last few days and it has hit, and I feel like crap and just want to go to bed, but the show must go on. On the bright side, my neck feels better, still not back to normal, but I have some mobility in it and it is not so painful....although sweet Finn has decided to move into a really super awesome position for birth that is making my lower back ache.  Ugh, I hate feeling crappy and hate not being able to just "do" like always!


Anyway, the hubs has to work tonight, so the kids and I are on our own as usual.  Flu shots this morning for the lot of them, then home to work on laundry and a few other odds and ends around the house.  I never got the grouting done, so I am thinking that just moved to the hubby's list for tomorrow :)  Today is mostly standard stuff, and I will make some Christmas cookies to stash away since we are coming down to the wire on those too.  I also have about 20 papers to grade for PT gig and 3 assignments for FT gig, so that should keep me hopping today as well.  Thank god for the fact that tomorrow the hubby is off AND he agreed to get up early to take Gray to a party, I am thinking that might have pushed me over the edge.

Whining aside, and there has been plenty to go around lately since this has been a hard last few weeks for me physically, I cannot say enough for the awesomeness of my family.  They have been so good to me, listening to the complaining, doing whatever they could to help, and just being loving and sweet.  I know they are anxious for me to feel better and we are all so excited that we will be meeting our newest member in just a few short weeks/days.  No matter how tough the end of this pregnancy has been, no matter the pain or discomfort, it is worth it to get to have Finn join our crew.  Some days are hard, but they are all worth it.

Let's play happy homemaker

Today is my "at home" day which means I usually can get lots of stuff accomplished.  Add to that that the kids will not have to do homework when they get home, and it is basically the perfect day to get working on some projects.

I accomplished some grading and work work this morning, and made some white chocolate peppermint bark...mmm, we will need another batch :)  Dinner headed to the crockpot early, BBQ pork, and I just made some coleslaw to go with it and will dice up the potatoes and throw them in water for the mashed taters when Teagan naps.  Laundry still needs to be switched again, but that is the story of my life, and I promised the big kids we could make the peanut butter blossom cookies when they get home, which means I need to make the dough and cook 3/4 of them before that so they can help with the last two pans. I was hoping to hang the curtains in Grayson's room, but the brackets have gone missing, so I need to look for those, and I have to regrout (yes I said regrout) the tub tonight after the hubby and kids shower :)

I am hoping that Teagan takes a good long nap so I can get this stuff done, the hubs works tonight and tomorrow and then has to take Gray to a party Sunday, so he can't help much, Monday I have a doctor's appt and we need to get the tree, and I work, Tuesday is last minute errand day and I promised the kids dinner out and that we will decorate the tree and then we head back into the craziness...ah life, always an adventure :)

Feeling human again..however a bit random

I am feeling better today, I think the massive non-stop heat all last night really made a difference, I am still sore, but I can do things like lift Teagan and move without crying...progress!

Teagie and I ran around first thing this morning, did a good shop at Weggies, stopped at the farm and then came home and started the butternut squash soup for dinner tonight.  It has squash, bacon, apples and onions in it with coriander and sage...yum!  We will have "fancy" grilled cheese on the side, I have American, Cheddar, Provolone and Brie for the kids to choose from and they can add tomato or bacon to the sandwich too all on a nice hearty whole grain bread, should be a yummy and filling dinner. Havey has dance tonight and I am hoping I can get some grading done while she is in class...we will see if the other kids cooperate.

Made it through class yesterday, still need to make it through Monday to make my goal...even better if I make it the following week too :) 

I would also like to personally thank Mini Boden for the super cute two pack of rompers I was able to order last night for under $3.50.  Thanks to a sale, free shipping and the 25 dollar voucher they sent, Finn will be super cute in his rompers. Nice deal for Mini Boden stuff!

Not sure what to call today

Let's see...last night my sore neck became a horrifically impossible to move neck.  I took some meds, strategically place a heating pad and finally passed out around 11 pm only to be woken to what sounded like Armageddon outside my window.  There was a wicked thunderstorm blowing through and of course it woke Teagan who when i grabbed her out of bed, wrenching my neck in the process, I realized she had wet through.  Thankfully, I had a diaper upstairs and she and I spent the storm time getting her changed into a clean dipe and jammies.  Settled her in bed and passed back out.

This morning when I got up, I was in so much pain but figured it was just from sleeping and hopped in a shower since I had an OB appt.  The shower didn't help so I tried calling the hubby at work to see if he could meet me at the doctor and help with Teagan, my girls got her out of the crib for me since I couldn't lift her and we got the day going.  My neighbor was taking the big kids early for me so they could catch the bus, but I ended up taking Haven along to the doc to help with Teagan since I was hurting so badly.  Got to the doc and of course as soon as we get there, Teagan has a poopy diaper and the dipes and wipes were in the car :(  Then I find out it is one of those drop your pants appointments...wheeee!  Oh, and they took blood too, lucky me.  Hubby made it there as we were leaving, and he took Haven up to school, then met me at home to help with Teagan.  As he was headed to bed, the sitter called to cancel since she had an emergency, so my poor husband took a nap on the couch while Teagan napped after working all night the day before since I had to go teach.

Thankfully, he is working from home tonight, and while he is super tired, he is here if I need help with the kids and I am hoping that by morning my neck will be better.  I am even giving myself the night off, no work at all since I am trying to relax and mend, no way this can keep up!

Let the hormones run.....

sing along with me to the tune of "Let the rivers run" now everybody!


Ugh, hormones, how I HATE them.  Usually at this point I have found some weird, crazy, minuscule item to hyper focus on and that is where all my hormone energy goes, but this time, dammit, I have no damn worries, tough life I know!

Everything at work is good.  Everything with Ryan's work is good.  Money, house and cars are good.  Kids are totally excellent.  So now I have been able to focus on myself and what sucks is I am in a TON of pain :(  I did something to my neck and the muscle is tender, plus it is nearly impossible to refrain from turning my head, how else I am supposed to shoot a look at a naughty kid?  The baby is practicing his kung-fu, and last night around 4 am when I was still awake and couldn't sleep he was so low and there was so much pain that I was sure I was going to be one of those freaky woman who don't know they are in labor, fall asleep and then wake up with a baby in the bed.  It didn't happen obviously, but it was a scary thought!

I am trying trying trying to get the last few things done without completely killing myself with pain.  If I walk too much, I get regular painful contractions so I am trying to keep that under control until after class next Monday, and then I plan to take a jog around campus while eating habaneros to try and kick this kid out!

So I am totally slacking on dinner and getting Chinese food, and given I teach tomorrow and have a doctor's appointment at the crack of dawn, I am afraid they may get pizza tomorrow night.  My husband assures me that this is OK since I am pretty sure this has never happened before and I am planning four big homemade meals Thursday-Sunday, but i still feel the mama guilt.


OK, I guess I should take tylenol so I can pretend it will make my aching neck feel better...can I have those pain meds a few weeks early please?

Let the great countdown begin

When I found out I was pregnant again, well right after the shock and terror wore off, I looked at a calendar and tried to figure out how PT school would work. The goal I set way back then was to make it through until the last class before Thanksgiving, this would put me at 37 weeks which is when my last baby was born, and I knew I could manage anything after Thanksgiving break virtually.  My class works all term on a huge presentation and it takes two weeks of classes for them to be done...these two weeks are the last two weeks before Thanksgiving and I did not want them to do all that hard work and then me not be there :)

This week my Monday class has their first week of presentations and my Wednesday class has their second, which means I only need to survive class tonight, Weds and next Monday and I will have made my goal :)

I have a few more things on the "to-do" list.  I washed all of Finn's stuff last night and will fold and put it away this morning.  Ryan is moving the jumperoo and swing around today and straightening the closet under the stairs so my mom can find cleaning supplies, Thursday I will get the curtains for the playroom and Grayson's room and hang them and a new toy box for Teagan's stuff that has overtaken the family room.  Next Monday, we will get the Christmas tree up and the lights on, Tuesday we will do a big grocery shopping and Wednesday morning the whole family will decorate the tree and the rest of the house....then, and only then, will I feel "ready"

Can you have anxiety over not having anxiety?

We are in such a good place right now, probably the best place we have ever been, so when I wake up in the morning I no longer have a panicked feeling which is so strange for me...but nice!

Last night we were planning a dinner out and then Teagan spiked a 102 fever.  Thankfully, we realized it is just the same virus that Britt had earlier in the week and we gave her some meds and headed out.  The kids were good at dinner and the food was OK, I just wish I could eat more than two bites in a sitting, my stomach is so squished up by baby that I have no room.  On our way home, we stopped at CVS to burn some of the funds left on the medical spending account and to stock up on over the counter meds since we won't be able to use the spending account for them next year.  Finally at home we settled the kids into bed and I headed up to grade some papers and try to relax a bit.  Sadly Teagan had a bad night and I didn't get a whole lot of sleep, she was just restless and wanted to be held a lot.

Today we are trying to get a few small things done and relax.  I am finally washing Finn's clothes today as I feel pretty confident that he will be here in the next few weeks.  Britt and I ran to the store to get the necessities for the week, and Ryan just made pancakes for all of us for lunch, including blueberry for me YUMMY.  Dinner we will be using up the remaining steaks from our last beef order and will have Caesar salad and ranch potatoes on the side.  I really hope the beef comes in this week or next, we are almost out of everything and I cannot bring myself to buy the grocery store meat.


Looking ahead, we have a rough week planned.  Tomorrow I teach, Tuesday Ryan is working OT, Wednesday I have a doctor's appointment at 8:30 am followed by work, Thursday the girls have their morning activity and we have dance at night, Saturday the kids have flu shots and Sunday Gray has a birthday party!  Thankfully the following week is much more manageable with me working Monday and then Tuesday Ry and I will go do a big shopping to stock up for when the baby comes.  The kids and I will be here alone for Thanksgiving so we will have movies and appetizers and then we will all celebrate together on Saturday.  I am definitely looking forward to Christmas break :)

The theme of my life...nest and work

We had an easy start to the morning, all three girls slept in until 8 and Gray and I were up around 7:30 and sat in my bed watching cartoons :)  Got breakfast and Ryan came home, made a super fast run to the bank and reveled in the 25 voucher I received to Mini Boden...oh Mini Boden how I love you but cannot usually afford you!

After the bank run, my two middle kids fulfilled their punishment from Thursday when they were rotten.  They came into the mudroom with me and we cleaned it from top to bottom, including the extra fridge and upright freezer!  Everything is now organized in there, scrubbed clean and will make it easy for my mom to find things when she comes to watch the kids.  I do need to organize the pantry shelves a bit, but for the most part, they are ready to go.

Worked some, fed the kiddos and now just counting down the next two hours until the hubby is up and we all get ready to go out for a nice family dinner.  SO excited to have dinner out and nothing to do when we get home!